The Will
> >
Doug Smith is on his deathbed
> > and knows the end is near.
> > His nurse, his wife, his
> > daughter and 2 sons, are with him.
> > He  asks for 2 witnesses
> > to be present and a camcorder be in place to
> > record his last wishes, and when all is ready he begins
> to speak:
>
> > My
> > son, "Bernie, I want you to take the  Mayfair
> > houses.""

> > My
> > daughter "Sybil, you take the apartments over in the
> > east end.""

> > My
> > son, "Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in
> the
> > City Centre."

"Sarah, my dear wife,
> > please take all the residential buildings on the banks
> of
> > the river."
> >The nurse  and witnesses
> > are  blown away as they did not realize his extensive
> > holdings, 
> and as Doug slips away, 
> > the nurse says, "Mrs. Smith, your husband must have
> > been such a
> > hard-working man to have
> > accumulated all this property".

>Sarah replies, "Property ? .... the ******* had a paper
> > route!"
> >

Anyone else having trouble with restaurants this time of year. Ours usually serve Eggs Bennedict on chrome dishes but always seem to stop around now.

I hate that because, as we all know, there's no plates like chrome for the Hollandaise.

       

          

-- Edited by john nail on Monday 8th of December 2014 09:42:48 AM

Americans With No Abilities Act (AWNAA)

President Barack Obama and the Democratic Senate are considering
sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many more
Americans. The Americans With No Abilities Act is being hailed as a
major legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who
lack any real skills or ambition.

"Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and
drive necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in
society," said California Sen. Barbara Boxer. "We can no longer stand
by and allow People of Inability (POI) to be ridiculed and passed
over.
With this legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant
special favors to a small group of workers, simply because they have
some idea of what they are doing."

In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S.
Postal Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing
opportunity without regard to performance. At the state government
level, the Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record
of hiring Persons with No Ability (63 percent).

Under the Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million
mid-level positions will be created, with important-sounding titles
but little real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of
purpose and performance.

Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given to
guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees.
The legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that
promote a significant number of Persons of Inability (POI) into
middle-management positions, and give a tax credit to small and
medium-sized businesses that agree to hire one clueless worker for
every two talented hires.

Finally, the Americans With No Abilities Act contains tough new
measures to make it more difficult to discriminate against the
non-abled, banning, for example, discriminatory interview questions
such as, "Do you have any skills or experience that relate to this
job?"

"As a non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who
have something going for them," said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her
position as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint, Mich., due to
her inability to remember rightytighty, leftyloosey. "This new law
should be real good for people like me. I'll finally have job
security." With the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other
untalented citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Said Sen. Dick Durbin, IL: "As a senator with no abilities, I believe
the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be extended
to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers to
provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her
inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation
and a good salary for doing so."

Having children is hereditary. If your parents didn't have any kids odds are you won't either.

          

-- Edited by john nail on Monday 16th of February 2015 10:35:02 AM

I just seen on one of the political discussion shows that Hillary Clinton has received Tens of Millions of dollars in campaign contributions from foreign interests out side the United States. Now what do you think they want for their investment ? Man I hope this country wakes up and smells the coffee before it is too late.

The Eagle is gone


The skunk has replaced the Eagle as the new symbol of the American Presidency.
It is half black, half white, and everything it does, stinks.